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Health

What to know before your elderly parent moves in

By Dean Shaw · On August 17, 2018

With the high cost of assisted living, many people would rather have their parents move in with them once they’re no longer able to live alone in their own home. After all, our parents worked hard and sacrificed to ensure we would have the best possible life. It’s only fair that we do the same once we are grown up right?

While it may seem natural to have your parent move in with you, there are a few things you’ll need to do first.

Before anything happens, talk to your family members about what this move will mean. Consider how the move will impact your spouse and children. Think about how the family activities and routine will be impacted, and whether or not you’ll need to remodel your house to make it work. Talk to your family about whether they’ll need to pitch in with additional chores, and whether you can afford the extra expense or afford to pay for a caregiver during the day while you’re at work.

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Now is also the time to talk to your parent about what the move will mean for them. Talk about their feelings and how they may be resenting the loss of their independence. Let them know any of their feelings are valid, and if they need to talk to you, you’ll be there with a ready ear. Talk openly about any expectations you and your parent may have about how the living arrangements will work. It’s best to get any concerns out in the open before they move in.

Most homes won’t be immediately ready for an elderly parent. If they have mobility issues, they may have difficulty getting around- and you may need to remove any old furniture or junk that’s in the way. Stairlifts can be another good option, and if you find the best price on a stairlift they can actually be a relatively economical choice compared to adding a new bedroom on the ground floor. Bathrooms can also be very dangerous for the elderly, since they’re often slippery and there are so many hard surfaces to land on. Consider installing some grip bars and adding non-slip mats to keep them safe.

You’ll also need to consider your schedule and how much time you can devote to your parent. If they can do the basics like bathe, get dressed, go to the bathroom, and make a basic meal, you’ll be fine. But if they find these things challenging or impossible, you may need to arrange for a carer to help them during the day.

 

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Dean Shaw

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